The Wahkiakum County Eagle - Established as The Skamokawa Eagle in 1891

To The Eagle:

I applaud your Jim Crow editorial. The power of the press is very convincing. It worked in Nazi Germany. With only one newspaper in the county, it will surely work here.

I believe we should go back to the principles of the Salem witch hunts and root out all suspected racists and kick them out of our county, since we can’t burn them at the stake. We can have you and Senator Jayapal point them out for us. We have less important things that concern us, like hungry people and terrorists.

Let’s go back to the McCarthy era and blacklist all people suspected of any thoughts or actions that may be the “image you do not want our county to project.” Let’s make every citizen in the county come into the courthouse and swear they have never been or associated with any racist or friend of a racist.

Let’s make people burn all their navigation charts, history books and maps that even mention that (you know what) name.

Let’s ban all books written by Anne Rice. I’m sure if we look back far enough we can find a connection between her and that other Rice, writer of that (you know what) song.

We can make everyone with with a white house paint it with color. If they don’t comply we will call them a racist and stop talking to them. People named Jim must change the spelling to Gym. All crows will be called little ravens.

We will erase one name from the Lewis and Clark Trail signs, since he had a slave. We will change the name of our state, since we don’t want to “define our heritage” with another slave owner. While we’re at it, we can ban any reference to Thomas Jefferson since he raped his slave. Let’s destroy all records of them in the National Archives and all history books that even mention them.

Let’s blow up (you know what) racist point and that racist stream. This will cleanse our sins. We will have everyone that remembers the (you know what) racist name, brainwashed so that they don’t inadvertently say it and have to be branded a racist.

An ordinance should be enacted saying “If any person visiting Wahkiakum County is offended by anything, we must cower and beg their forgiveness.”

Joe Budnick, who lived as did his father, grandfather and great grandfather between that racist point and that racist creek, who for 70 years did not know he was promoting racism.

Joe Budnick

Puget Island