The Eagle Outdoors

It should come as no surprise to those of you who have followed my ramblings here in The Eagle that I question many things. For instance, where does time go? I mean, where exactly is noon yesterday? Did it simply get lumped into the past, or is it actually somewhere where, if given an adventurous Uber driver, one could travel to? I asked my father that same question years ago and, if memory serves, he gave me his regular deadpan look, mumbled something akin to 'Uh...huh,' and went back to reading The Youngstown Vindicator. So much for the wisdom of the Sages.

Seriously, though, I have questions. One is can anyone explain to me the rationale behind ice fishing? I grew up, as you know, in the Upper Midwest during the 1970s. This was before the (cue the sarcastic air quotes) 'myth' of climate change when Ohio was still cold, and that cold was traditionally accompanied by three things: snow, lots of snow, and ice. As there's really not a whole hell of a lot to do in Northeastern Ohio in January, February, March, or the first two weeks of April, people did things such as wrap themselves in eight inches of the warmest clothes they own, cautiously walk out onto a frozen pond, drill multitudinous holes through the ice, and then huddle around said holes seated on a five-gallon bucket while slowly and deliberately raising and lowering a microscopic mealworm-tipped lure in the depths below. All of this to (hopefully) catch a yellow perch or crappie or bluegill, and, again hopefully, not freeze off any number of body parts.

Don't get me wrong. Fishing is great fun. I love fishing. I love the act of fishing, even when it's not in partnership with catching. I enjoy being out in Mother Nature, watching the birds and communing with "The Great Outdoors." I'm known to be ecstatic when I find the uneaten half of a stale Hostess cherry pie in the bottom of my tackle bag. Even with all this, I don't understand ice fishing. Isn't it still possible to attempt to catch the same perch when it's 70 degrees as opposed to seven? Wear shorts rather than a snowmobile suit? Apply sunscreen instead of tucking Hot Hands chemical handwarmers into the innermost of my four sets of longhandles I'd shoehorned myself into at home? By the way, youngsters who have never lived where it's truly cold, 'longhandles' are long underwear. They're the ones with the little two-button flap in the rear like the younger brother Randy wore in "A Christmas Story."

Perhaps it's just me. I never saw the appeal of sitting on the ice while fishing through the ice. Because ice fishing and softball share one thing in common - that being an excellent excuse to drink beer outside - if it's keeping your Pabst Blue Ribbon cold, then ice fishing is definitely worth looking into.

Then there's the safety aspect of ice fishing. Watching a bobber float the surface of Old Man Jones' farm pond from the bank mid-June is, and I think you'll all agree, relatively harmless. Running a snowmobile two miles out onto Lake Erie in late January to catch a walleye? Every year, the Coast Guard (CG) gets contacted to come rescue some number of icefishermen who have found themselves adrift on an ice floe the size of the Grays River Valley that has broken off and is headed toward Canada. Anglers, the CG rule is "go." Equipment - including snow machines, trucks, ice shanties, and tackle - stays; eventually, becoming bottom structure. There is a choice, I'm told. Buy new gear, but go home safe, or hope the northward-drifting ice shelf comes to rest near the Tim Horton's donuts in Kingsville, Ont. Choose the latter, and I'd recommend the 'Tim Bits.' They're exceptional.

The Outdoor Speed Round

I saw the first deer across from the house a couple days back since late buck season ended in mid-November. I've always found it interesting how they're under the apple trees daily until modern rifle season begins; then, they're gone, only to reappear not long after everything is said and done for the year. Do you think they have the 'MyWDFW' app on their iPhones?

Speaking of new, the WDFW announced on Nov. 19 that their newest technological aid to outdoors enthusiasts - the aforementioned MyWDFW app - is available for free download in Google Play or Apple app stores. Per the department, "The MyWDFW app is a comprehensive mobile licensing tool for both hunters and anglers. It supports license purchases, displays active hunting and fishing license privileges, and enables electronic tagging for a wide range of game species, including deer, elk, turkey, and black bear. App users can also report migratory bird harvests and submit end-of-season harvest reports. Other functionalities incorporated into MyWDFW, and also available in the newly updated Fish Washington® app, include catch record cards for select fish species and an Enforcement View for WDFW officers, along with access to customer licensing (WILD) profiles."

Although I'm writing this on Sunday, Dec. 7 – Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day – I feel pretty safe in saying the rain's finally here, and lots of it. Just an FYI, sand and bags are available at most of the county fire departments/stations, including Fire District 4's Elochoman Station (Beaver Creek). Stay informed by going to the Wahkiakum County Emergency Management pages online. Coordinator Austin Smith has done a tremendous job of providing a wealth of resources here. Take care of your animals, make sure they have what they need, and be safe out there.